Creating New Routes While Honoring Established Paths

To successfully navigate any journey, it is important to balance packing the essentials and shedding dead weight, knowing when to carry the momentum and when to pause to rest and enjoy the view.

Packing Essentials

I am embracing my need for movement that takes me from point A to B. Interestingly, I had the same essential almost a year ago, but I guess that is why it is essential. After 35 years of running being a core piece of my day, life, and identity, the pain from cartilage loss has forced me to stop. I have played it safe by limiting myself to lifting weights and lap swimming, but am struggling to mourn the loss without my primary coping mechanism. After a deep dive of what I missed beyond the act of running, I discovered the most important part of me is I process while moving with changing scenery. I have started waking before the kids on weekends to sneak in a solo hike, and dusted off my road bike. I am making peace with the new ways of moving, while realizing that even though it’s different, it still helps me stay connected to who I am.

Lightening the Load

I am letting go of perfection. This is tough, as it is buried deep, perhaps one of the first things I packed. Somewhere along the way I internalized that I only had value if I did not fail or, at least, recovered miraculously. However, I was told recently that I don’t have to be perfect to be loved. Apparently this is a thing that some people have always known, but I’ll take the lesson late rather than never. I feel lighter every time I remind myself that U get to be imperfect AND have worth and value to myself and others.

Enjoying the View

I am really loving where my kids are right now. Reminding myself I have always loved them with their imperfections has enabled me to be more present with my kids. I am showing up in the ways my kids need, while letting go of my worries about how they might struggle with their imperfections or parts of themselves they’re still learning to navigate. I am able to see possibility over constraint. I am able to just play and be.

Building Momentum

I am finding strength in making positive changes and breaking old patterns. At times it is overwhelming, and I almost feel as if I am fighting against myself, but I can see how my commitment has paid off when I reflect on my experiences and responses of a year ago. I’m grateful for the safe spaces where I can experiment, make mistakes, and grow without the pressure of needing to be perfect. I’ll remind myself of the coyote I encountered a few weeks ago that was determined to follow his path, even with people and large dogs in his way.